Pleading Guilty to Loving ABM

By Gemma Jacob

It is not a pre-requisite that you love ABM in order to be my friend, however it certainly doesn’t hurt. In the space of only a few months Carm M., a fellow-Gleek, food lover, and most importantly – fan of all things ABM, has come to be one of my favourite NYers.

Our friendship has formed as fast as she fell for ABM, over the course of a single day in 2010. I find that those who fall fast for ABM to be truly outstanding individuals, and I am under no legal obligation to say though even though I have already contracted her services upon completion of her Law degree.  Those are always handy friends to have.

She has a sharp sense of humour and an even sharper wit. She would happily spend the day singing along to a musical or drooling over the Food Channel. There’s definitely something about this ABM Fan that makes her outstanding enough for me to still count her as one of my very good friends despite her admitting to being a Sophie fan. I surround myself in the very best ABM loving company!

ABMFans: Okay, so I know the answer to this one, kinda, but how did you get into ABM?

Carm: It was my last few days at a very boring job over the summer of 2010. I was spending my days living vicariously through Bobby aka the Brooklynite, who was in London at the time. His Londoner pal was a Ms Gemma Jacob, who kept mentioning this ABM show. I wanted to know what all the rage was about so I watched one episode during lunch, then two, and then I had managed to get through the whole two seasons in one sitting. It was probably one of the best days that summer.

ABMFans: So what you’re saying is it was sort of my fault?

Carm: No. It was definitely your fault. Oh and the Brooklynite. We can blame this on him as well.

ABMFans: Nah I’m taking credit for this one.

Carm: Sounds good. Another notch for your belt.

ABMFans: Tell me you just weren’t having a boring day at the job, what made you keep watching?

Carm: No. The boring day at the job got me to watch the first episode. Trying to figure out where the story was going is what got me to watch the second. And then the dang cliff hangers had me going through Season 2. They also had me almost yelling at my computer screen. which was a little awkward in an office of only two people. And THEN I find out Season 3 is in the air…heartbreak.

ABMFans: I’ve been there, not in an office but yelling at your PC at 5am is generally not a good idea in a sleeping household. How are you coping in the space between the seasons?

Carm: Randomly watching an episode here or there…Noticing new things I hadn’t seen before. And definitely the fan site is helping. I’m not usually the type to get caught up in a show to the point of caring anything about the actors outside of the show.

ABMFans: For that you may get a Jamba Flatbread as well, they’re good.

Carm: So it’s been fun following people from the cast on twitter, and seeing snippets of their interviews. Oh and randomly running into Rachael and only remembering her twitter name.

ABMFans: Yes, you’ve run into HipFlor, in a fashion, what was that like? By the way, she does remember you.

Carminia: Sweet!!! That was fun, and super random. It was a couple of months after I started watching the show, and I was on my way to a temp gig. She was doing the NY actor bit where they have 100 jobs to support themselves and was doing some temp work too I guess.

ABMFans: Most likely.

Carm: But I saw her in Times Square and turned into a total fan, “Oh my god!!! I know you! You’re ummm…uhhh…from Anyone But Me…HipFlor!!!”

ABMFans: Aww! You fan you.

Carm: She was so nice, and smiled and said, “Yeah, I’m Rachael.” I of course was running late to where I needed to be.

ABMFans: Yeah sometimes she remembers to be nice.

Carm: So I told her I thought she was awesome; I loved the show and had to go. She said I should just come back after she would be around for a few hours. But when I was done like an hour later, she was nowhere to be found…and I didn’t want to roam Times Square looking for her. That seemed a bit much.

ABMFans: To be fair, she probably got lost.

Carm: You’re a real pal ya know? Ha ha ha.

ABMFans: You may have been searching a while.

Carm: I bet she was busy doing hard work and things.

ABMFans: Or eating.

Carm: Helping an old lady cross a street or something. Ooh eating. Yes that sounds right.

ABMFans: Next time search food places first.

Carm: Well if the first place I stop in has anything with Bacon, I won’t make it very far.

ABMFans: It could very well be, she’s a bit of a bacon fiend too. It’s one of the many reasons she is my friend.

Carm: Hmmm maybe I’ll stalk her out after this Lent business is over. We can find some bacon maple donuts. I have a feeling she’d be a fan.

ABMFans: Bacon and sugar? I think so. Please feed her some Jamba too, the girl needs fruit.

Carm: This sounds delicious.

ABMFans: Apart from the awesomeness that we agree is Rachael Hip-Flores, what do you think of the rest of the ABMers?

Carm: I love Sophie’s hair. LOVE. And the web-a-thon they had was fun because we got to see their personalities…But yeah, I’m a huge Sophie fan. Nicole Pacent is hot. Clearly.

ABMFans: I’m more a Jessy fan than a Sophie fan. And yeah Nicole, just a little bit.

Carm: Well you would like to delete Sophie. Ha ha ha but fair, Jessy.

ABMFans: Not delete, just stand her next to someone other than Vivian.

Carm: And I’m awful with names, but Sophie’s ex-bf. The actor does stand-up.

ABMFans: Mitchell.

Carm: Yes! I wasn’t in town for his show but that would have been fun to see.

ABMFans: He has stuff on YouTube, I shall link you.

Carm: And then of course the lucky fellow you got to stalk out in London for the web-a-thon.

ABMFans: I did not stalk Josh! He just happened to be where I was…

Carm: The video clip begs to differ. And you just happened to be wherever he was?

ABMFans: I plead the 5th. I have a lawyer and everything, well once you graduate. Exactly! Pure coincidence.

Carm: I’d like to see more of the rest of the cast though, definitely.

ABMFans: They are an awesome bunch.

Carm: So random, but I’m about to write a letter to someone who’s last name is bunch.

ABMFans: You dork.

Carm: Moving along from the name calling please…

ABMFans: Here’s something I’ve wanted to ask to a NYer, your city is ALL over TV and in movies, it’s everyone’s favourite location, what makes ABM fit NY?

Carm: ABM catches what I like about NY…the regular streets, the random building stoop, a park or a bookstore. They show some landmarks, and those are nice, but it’s the shots of random NYC street that makes me think: Ah New York, aren’t you awesome? Also I have a fondness for the Metronorth station on 125th and Park. I’m there quite often. So that makes me smile.

ABMFans: Yes, given your commute you know that a 30min train ride isn’t a world away.

Carm: Yeah, VivSter has it easy. Aster lives right in Manhattan, and Vivian is in Westchester. Let’s move Aster to Brooklyn and see how they deal with that! Or when Vivian ends up at Yale…I’m pretty sure that’s going to happen. And Aster is at NYU.

ABMFans: I think Vivian’s Columbia bound.

Carm: She wants to. Because, duh it’s in NY…but that would be too easy.

ABMFans: Not if she keeps kissing Sophie.

Carminia: Sophie will follow…at Barnard. Embrace her love of girls.

ABMFans: As long as she’s not embracing Vivian it’s all good.

Carm: Ha ha ha ha. I would love to see you and a Sophie/Vivian fan battle it out. Sophian? Do they have a nickname?

ABMFans: You want to see someone get hurt?

Carm: Or are you morally opposed to it.

ABMFans: Yeah that’s it. I normally have to spit after I say it. Get the taste out.

Carm: Well that’s unfortunate. They don’t have a good nickname. No way they’ll last.

ABMFans: Exactly! Did Brad and Jennifer have a catchy nickname? I don’t think so.

Carm: LMAO at you spitting after saying Sophian.

ABMFans: Look what happened…

Carm: Brad and Jen.

ABMFans: BrAngelina though…they are a word.

Carm: Dang it, now I’m trying to think of an awesome nickname…I don’t think I have one. AHHH!!!

ABMFans: For who?

Carm: My relationship is doomed.

ABMFans: Carby?

Carm: I should probably just end it now. Gemma saves the day.

ABMFans: I might get a glare from your other half for that.

Carm: That sounds like a cartoon or a toy. That’s fine. He’s the smaller half.

ABMFans: Or something Adam Richman would say he’s feeling after a Man Vs Food-fest.

Carm:: (Don’t question my math or knowledge of percents…I’m a Law student.) Swoon Adam Richman. Can we stalk him out next time you cross the ocean?

ABMFans: Sure, whenever that may be.

Carm: Excellent.

ABMFans: I’ll stalk out Rach for you, you can find Adam for me.

Carm: Knowing our luck he’ll be in London at the time.

ABMFans: I suggest they’ll be near bacon.

Carm: Maybe we can set a trap of some sort. A one day bacon event…

ABMFans: This comes under legal privilege right? They can’t use this against us if something happened to them?

Carm: Not only will we attract those two, but we’d have a pool of new friends to choose from as well. Something? Nothing will happen to them. We all just want to hang out and eat bacon together. Exchange some hugs.

ABMFans: Whatever you say…pleading the 5th again.

Carm: We might want to edit some of that out of the interview you post online…for legal reasons.

ABMFans: Yes. Now, apart from a completely amazing ABM-Man Vs Food mash-up where Vivian challenges Adam Richman to a food duel, what would you like to see happen on the show?

Carm: I want VivSter to split for a bit. Aand let Vivian and Sophie experience their awkwardness, move past it and be the best of friends. :et Aster be the tortured soul for a bit. Deal with the hard stuff.

ABMFans: You know that Aster is likely to go off the rails right?

Carm: And have Vivian be all carefree and joyful.

ABMFans: She had a tendency to over-react…

Carm: She does, but maybe this level of drama will be so real, she will just have to deal. Cry like a mad woman for a few weeks and then learn to deal with problems like a normal human.

ABMFans: Please Vivian’s a writer, the whole tortured soul bit is intrinsic to her being.

Carm: Not a Theatre student.

ABMFans: Ooh says the Law student. Aster does need to grow up a bit.

Carm: Well Vivian needs to experience the happy side of things. Let her get drunk and be silly.

ABMFans: That could be really messy.

Carm: Like Rachel in Glee.

ABMFans: Shhh I haven’t seen it yet!

Carm: I love that everything I watch on TV can intersect. Rachel dies. Oops.

ABMFans: That Jamba’s getting thrown on your head for that.

Carm: I can feel you glaring from across the ocean. NOOOOOOO! Anywho, so yea, and like I said earlier, definitely more of the other characters.

ABMFans: Would you like to see them sing?

Carm: We got snippets of them towards the end of Season 2. In that last episode actually. But I want more. A musical episode, for sure. Especially because they have actual singers on cast. Something tells me I’d want Rachael and Josh humming in the background. But that’s not based on anything really.

ABMFans: Yes, I’ve seen at least three of them singing and Nicole has been singing as long as she’s been walking I believe. Rachael can sing. And Josh can dance, he can be the Mike Chang of ABM!

Carm: Excellent. That would be amazing. I predict a talent show episode of ABM. singing, dancing, comedy…

ABMFans: That would be amazing. Don’t they do that in American schools?

Carm: Talent shows? Yes at some. And in summer camps too. Or they have some sort of assembly and the classes just showcase the talents.

ABMFans: I’m taking that up with Tina and Susan, I want a Talent Show episode. Or a Prom.

Carm: That might be one of the easier demands you’ve made on them. Ooh Prom. Prom episodes always make me think of Saved by the Bell.

ABMFans: Hey now I do not make outlandish demands, and mostly they smile and nod their heads then ignore the Brit.

Carm: Well it’s easy because you’re so far. so they don’t have to worry about you showing up on their doorstep on a regular basis

ABMFans: True. But I can bug them in other ways. I’m sort of persistent like that. And you should never think that an ocean is going to stop me doing anything.

Carm: I luckily haven’t had any demands made on me yet. And I have obliged to your minor requests thus far…so I wouldn’t know.

ABMFans: Give it time.

Carm: Oh definitely not stop you, but surely delay or limit.

ABMFans: Maybe…

Carm: Although you have many allies in the US…so really you are always here.

ABMFans: And I exist in your time zone. I’m going to take over the world eventually.

Carm: I’m sure this ABM fan site has some role in your plan.

ABMFans: No comment.

Carm: I imagine chunks of this interview simply blacked out on screen for everyone’s protection.

ABMFans: No comment. Anyway, speaking of Prom…I keep seeing these stories about LGBT youth in the US not being able to go to their Prom, how do you think ABM helps the representation of LGBT youth? Does it help?

Carm: I haven’t heard too many of these stories, but I also am not very good about watching the news in general. ABM definitely helps the representation. It’s all about how LGBT youth are in the end, just youth…it’s part of the appeal of the show that the lesbian and the straight couples all have problems and they’re all in love. Hopefully it’s empowering LGBT youth and educating the non-LGBT, letting them see that just like Jane is worried about Johnny liking her…well Sarah is worried about Susie liking her. It’s a lot harder to harass someone when you realize you are so much alike.

ABMFans: Very true.

Carm: It’s so absurd they can’t go to prom though. Is it they don’t want them with same sex dates?

ABMFans: Mostly, it’s a sort of backwards logic sometimes. They don’t want the kids to be picked on so they say that a girl can’t wear a tux or two boys can’t go together because they’ll be seen as different. But the fact that they’re making a point of it just perpetuates the thinking that what they’re doing isn’t “normal.” Or that it’s wrong.

Carm: Yeah, no one notices them until people start saying, “Hey don’t notice them.”

ABMFans: This is why I love ABM, they are what they are. It doesn’t matter that they’re girls or that one of them’s black or anything else.

Carm: I think it’s what a lot of people love about it. And when people who aren’t gay are in love with the show, for what it is…it’s a testament to how great it is.

ABMFans: Truly.